I truly love him, I'm certain on that matter, though I know the fact that we haven't actually met in person. I remember what he told me before, that I should use my mind, and think all over and over and over again what I was saying blah blah blah. Whatever, I don't want to use my brain cells on this matter.
A few weeks ago, I opened up everything to my friends (S.A.W. Fab) and they cited different point of view about my situation. And I came to realized that they were somehow right. Sometimes I have to be in control of my emotions, I should take control of my emotions not the other way around. Their suggestions are not that easy for me, but I guess somehow I need to let go of what I felt for him. Why? Because there's really nothing to expect, in the first place I guess it was just me who had fallen. Ugh! I'm so confused really! I know it seems like I do have a lot of crushes blah blah! But it was just a mere infatuation and it's incomparable to what I really feel for him. I am more serious on my feelings for him more than the other; however, I can tell that he doesn't feel the same way as I do.
So I guess I have to bid adieu to my feelings for him, but it doesn't mean that I have to forget him at all. I will just save what is left in the deepest part of my heart. Because who knows maybe someday he'll feel the same, maybe in our next life.
I want to shout out loud that he's the only one I wanted to take care of. But I guess we were really like the sun and moon, never meant to meet until eclipse.
Farewell 'care bear'! I know this is what you want, because you keep on pushing me away.
